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21 May

It is funny how we define family.

Most people would define family as their parents and siblings, those they are biologically and legally related to.  I, however, would not define family that way.  I’d say that my immediate family would be the following people:

I have more contact with these people than I do with those I am actually related to.  I see these people more than those I am related to.  And when I need a shoulder to cry on, somebody to talk to, encouragement, or a helping hand, these people are there to help out long before my “family” even notices.  It is a sad but true fact.  I can count on my friends more than I can count on my “family”.  I know more about what is going on in these people’s lives than I do about the happenings of my family.

This all makes me sad and yet happy at the same time.  I am happy that I have such amazing friends, but I am sad that my family is so absent.  Such is life, though, I suppose.

Their loss.  *attempting to convince myself this is true*


Happy Mother’s Day

9 May

Happy Mother’s Day to all the women who fill the gap for absent mothers.

Happy Mother’s Day:

To the women who are there when mothers decide their kids are disposable.

To the women who bridge the gap when advice is needed or a shoulder needs to be cried on.

To the women who fill in when it’s not their job; who inspire; who motivate; who validate.

To the women who aren’t afraid to tell it like it is.

To the women who stand up and step in when a girl just needs a woman to help her in her journey.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the women, mothers and not alike, who have filled in and helped out in my life and made this past year bearable, wonderful, and meaningful-I couldn’t have done it without you.

The Sweetest Girl

5 Mar

I love my sister.  I am pretty positive that she is the best thing to ever happen to me.  So I thought it was time to recognize another person who has changed my life… my biggest reason for doing my best in life.  That person is my lil’ sis, Hanna.

Noticing Your Blessings: The Impact of Twitter on My Life

16 Feb

Not everybody understands twitter.  And not everybody wants to.  They think its simply another waste of time.  But twitter is a community, an ever-growing family.  In the year and a half that I have been on twitter, I have met many amazing people.  I have made some great friends that I never would have known otherwise.  And there are also the unspoken heroes… the people who have changed my life and don’t even know it.  So I am going to start writing about them.

Every once in awhile we need to remind ourselves how blessed we are.  In the same way, we need to let others know that who they are matters and that they do have an impact on others.  So every couple of days, I am going to update this blog with a post about somebody whom I have come to know solely because of twitter that has changed my life in some way, big or small.  And that starts now.

One of the first people that comes to mind is a woman I met for the first time only about three weeks ago.  I had seen her on twitter (she is quite a popular lady in these parts), but we’d never conversed.  But the from the very moment she said hello, the optimism and positivity of @girlmeetsgeek was obvious.  Her personality and laugh are infectious.  She is encouraging and caring and beyond delightful.  It’s obvious in her tweets and on her blog (… she has a huge heart and is nothing but genuine.  Whether her own struggle or someone else’s (like when i was in crisis over the loss of my hair), she is strong and doesn’t give up.  I’ve been reading back through quite a bit of her blog because, well, I have many lessons to learn from her.  So to the dear Kate-Madonna, thank you for being such a delight and unknowingly challenging my at times loathing self pity.  You are amazing!  Don’t ever forget it.

Lean On Me

14 Jan

We are now two weeks into the new year.  By this point, most people have done their evaluations of 2009, made (and broke) their new year’s resolutions, and moved on.  I, on the other hand, find it impossible to move on just yet.

2009 was the best of years and the worst of years for me.  There were struggles at the beginning, middle, and end.  In fact, it was the most difficult year of my life.  Many would wonder how I could consider the most difficult years of my life one of the best.  I guess it comes down to the fact that it is during your most difficult trials that you realize all that you really do have.  And 2009 was the year that I came to find all of the amazing people in my life.

It was in the simple words spoken and the thoughtful gestures, the phonecalls when I’m feeling complete broken, the long drives to save me when I need rescuing that I realized how much I truly am love, who my true friends are.

So thank you, first of all, to the friend who knew I was going through a tough spring and sent me a little “have fun” package including a restaurant gift card and one for blockbuster video.

Thank you to the person who sent me a picture of a birthday cake on my birthday because he knew the day had been horrendous and wanted to make me smile (and have a cake, because everyone deserves a birthday cake).

Thank you to the amazing friend who came and rescued me in Minneapolis when I called her at 4 AM because I was stuck in a horrible situation with a douchebag man and had no place to go.

Thank you to the people who take care of me and made sure I was safe when I would try to medicate my hurting heart with a trip to the bar.

Thank you to the person who helped bring back the joy of my childhood by giving me tickets to Disney on Ice for Christmas.  It was honestly one of the best gifts ever.

And last, but certainly not least, thank you to the person who gave me person who gave me the one of the most life-changing gifts ever.  Knowing that my family life has been very strained and that I was not looking forward to the holidays, this person helped make it possible for me to reconnect with my father and go visit him.  I hadn’t seen my father in years, and hadn’t had a real conversation with him in as long.  Thanks to this dear friend, I am now rekindling my relationship with my father, growing much closer to him.

I will be eternally grateful to all of these peoples, and will probably be looking for ways to repay them for years to come.

Keeping all of this in mind, I suggest that we all add to our list of resolutions to show our friends and family how much we appreciate them and be there when they need us the most.  I know that I will be.