Archive | April, 2011

Proper spelling and sentence structure, bacon, and probable reasons why I am single.

28 Apr

I not so secretly have a profile on OKCupid.  Why not?  I am single and ready to mingle, and it is a free and effortless way to meet new people.  I have met some awesome people who have turned into great friends thanks to OKCupid, but when it comes to date-worthy men, the results have definitely been lacking.  I suppose this is due to the fact that anybody, no matter how sleazy and cheap they are, can sign up.

Admittedly, my profile will make you think of me as either a) a tad bit funny and adorable or b) a pretentious bitch.
Example:
“I am really good at being fabulous. It is true. I will change your world.”
“I could go on and on, but sometimes I get the feeling that this summary thing is just like the flight instructions from the stewardess before takeoff- you are too busy being wrapped up in her good looks to pay much attention.”
“You should message me if:
–you know how to spell and use proper sentence structure
–you like bacon (if you do not, you probably should run)”

The amazing thing is how many messages I get from vegans who cannot spell to save their life.  Also amazing is the number of times I have gotten follow-up messages from men calling me a rude bitch because I will not meet or sleep with a man who cannot spell properly or form a proper sentence.

Oh, and per the vegan animal rights activist who asked me on a date… I am a bitch for turning down his offer for a date simply because he is an animal rights activist and I like bacon.  All along I was just trying to be respectful and let him know I need more meat in me than dating him could provide…

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On relationships.

26 Apr

I never thought that at nearly 24, I would be single.

I know this sounds stupid, but I didn’t.  As a young girl and into my teenage years, I pictured myself as the girl who would run off to college, meet the love of her life, and be married by the time she was 21. That picture couldn’t have been more of a lie.

I didn’t run off to college.  I didn’t meet the love of my life (although I know some people who can attest to the fact that I thought I had… a few times).  And lord knows I couldn’t be further from marriage.

But my story isn’t all that uncommon these days.  It seems that many of my fellow twenty- and thirty- somethings are embracing this decade as a one of singleness, growth, and fun.  One of exploring life with the mindset that love might come along, but we aren’t going to sit around waiting for it or forcing it.

I opened up a dialog with a bunch of people regarding their experiences with dating and relationships, and it has been amazing.  So many stories, so many points of view.  The story of one of my best friends who’s fairytale romance has quietly been anything but a fairytale.  The story of a friend who has never gone on a date.  The story of a friend who met the love of his life simply by being in the right bar at the right time.

In some ways, it has left me hopeful.  Hopeful that one day I may find the right person and have the fairytale love story.  Hopeful that it won’t always be tough being the single girl navigating the dating world.  But in some ways, it has left me feeling destined for failure.  Because really, if 15 people have 15 completely different viewpoints on all these different issues, will I ever find somebody who feels the way I do?  Or will I have to compromise?

Over the next few weeks, I am going to delve into the nooks and crannies of dating.  I am going to explore everything from first dates to intimacy to marriage.  I am going to explore monogamy and religion and whether they have a place in dating or not.

It will be fun.  But it will also be honest.  You’ve been warned.

***I am a horrible person and never followed up on this.  I suppose I should now.  -B , 9/13/2011

invisible.

3 Apr

I am begging for you to see me.
Maybe you do.
Maybe you just choose to look away.