Mess of words

14 Nov

I poured my heart out last night in a mess of words.  I just let things go; let things flow.  And even though not everything made sense, even though it was all a jumbled mess of emotions, it was a jumbled mess of me.  And that is what matters.

I have a hard time being honest with myself sometimes.  I get my hopes up; I get my expectations up.  I believe in fairytales.  I believe in dreams as reality.  I fool myself into thinking that I can have what I want.  Or I fool myself into thinking that I want what I have to settle for.

And dammit, I am sick of settling!  I deserve more, and it is about time I demand what I deserve.

I poured my heart out in a mess of words last night.  And a mess it definitely was.  But that is okay, because if it takes a mess of words to state and demand what I deserve, a mess of words is perfection.

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2 Responses to “Mess of words”

  1. Erik Hare November 15, 2010 at 8:49 pm #

    That all sounds great to me!

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    […] hurt and got hurt.  I had monumental heartaches and heartbreaks.  I remembered the loss of my brother.  I suffered from severe depression that nearly ruined my […]

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